Thursday, February 16, 2006

Liver me timbers

When I was little, my parents used to buy the family-sized deal of fried chicken from Popeye's. I think it was a Sunday tradition. One time, they ordered a side of chicken liver. Gross. I swore I would never try it. But then, Dad offered me a taste, disguised as "dark meat" and it was delicious, though I still felt weird eating it. I went zombie-mode on that chicken liver and never looked back. One year, when I was going to church, the youth-leader was making an order for Popeye's and I was the weirdo who wanted the livers. I found it amusing that nobody wanted to even try a tiny piece. My fat ass indulged with unbridled jubilation and I was "the girl who munched livers".

Earlier this week, I had a craving for chicken liver and convinced Zac that it was a life-or-death situation. I would turn myself inside out if I couldn't eat the livers. He reluctantly went out to make the purchase to soothe the beast Bud within. After consuming the much sought-after craving, followed by an enormous glass of Barq's Red Cream Soda, I ran right to the toilet and became a human volcano. I will never touch liver again (at least not any time soon). The same goes for Wendy's Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers.

Tonight, Zac brought me to a seafood restaurant for a late-Valentine's Day dinner. We usually do celebrations after the holidays to avoid the wait and to get the discounted seasonal things. The idea that gumbo would be tasty popped into my over-crowded brain. I made the order, but once it arrived and I smelled it, something churned and told me do not put it in my mouth. What did I do, you ask? I put it in my mouth. A few minutes later, I knew I'd be seeing that bite again. As I was hurrying to the bathroom, I bumped into a girl I used to go to church with. She chatted with me for a second with the "Hey, oh my god, it's been forever!" speech, while I struggled to be polite and nod, desperately trying to keep my food dynamite from detonating. I hope I wasn't rude when I excused myself quickly and rushed into the bathroom and threw everything up. My waitress copped an attitude with me when I asked for a To-Go box, but I was ready to get out of there and get home. This little Bud is making my food choices unpredictable.