So, VBS was this week. Jac signed up as my assistant since he's in the youth, which he was happy about since he had access to the teacher's lounge and the "good food". My first night doing crafts was Monday... sand projects. You know, where you take a tiny funnel and put colorful sand in a tiny container? It sucked. I had two groups come in. The first was 4th-5th graders, including my Leah. They weren't terrible, only 6 of them. They shared, they made jokes about boneless pizza, they were well-behaved. Jac felt a little sad that he couldn't be in the group with them, but I let him do the sand project, too. My next group was 1st-3rd grade and, let me tell you, I could hear O Fortuna as they scrambled down the hall to my classroom. I had all the jars set up neatly and these little monstrosities of stranger spawn started screaming and grabbing for their own sand, "THIS ONE IS MINE!" "QUICK, GRAB THAT ONE BEFORE SOMEONE ELSE DOES!" Like, um, you brats is gonna share. It was rough.
Tuesday was a little better, far less messy. No paint, no glitter, no markers. I had the kids color some wind chimes with crayons. I wonder if it's universal child language to always be discontent and need MORE things? I give one sand container, they want two. I give one wind chime, they want two. What is that? They were supposed to bring home flyers for their parents/guardians/etc. tonight and one kid was annoyed that he had to hold his wind chime AND a flyer. Another kid was chewing bubble gum and blew a bubble that popped all over her face and got in her eyelashes. This is why I'm not a public school teacher. I would probably put vodka in my water bottle or chloroform in their markers.
Wednesday, I was going to have the kids make some owl headphone holders, which looked better as bookmarks. The bigger kids made them easily, but the smaller kids were having trouble peeling the felt adhesives apart. So, they made butterflies instead. I have that one kid who just irks the hell outta me and of course, tonight she helps herself to the sand and makes a huge mess. She doesn't listen and is highly dramatic. But, there was pecan pie in the lounge, so I rewarded my patience.
Thursday was the last day! And I will hand them my death certificate if they try to rope me into teaching next year. Jac was an awesome helper this week. He helped make sure the kids had crayons, helped peel stickers, and helped me clean up. I'm proud of him. Leah and Elias performed their end-of-the-week songs and the boys won the canned goods competition (they had more), so the boys' leader (the pastor) threw a pie topped with glitter at the girl leader. Glitter galore. This felt like a really long week. Like, it felt like a month. I've never dealt with so many children that aren't mine in a long time. We have no plans on Friday but to stay in our pajamas and do absolutely nothing. No library, no groceries, but maybe doughnuts. I'm exhausted. Good news, though: Cole was suuuuuuuper good yesterday. Maybe he sensed I needed less crazy for the day, who knows? But he barely cried and he entertained himself in two-hour intervals throughout the day in his playpen, away from me. He actually played with toys and creeped around happily. It was so nice. Please oh please let this be a new thing.
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